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Cartoons, Violence, and the Prophet Muhammad February 7, 2006

So, we were stoked to start hyping up Olympic snowboarding today, but this whole business of cartoons and violence has gotten us too fired up not to comment.

For those of you who have been living in a remote snow yurt, there has been much ado lately about a set of political cartoons that were originally printed in a Danish newspaper in September of 2005. The cartoons, which were reprinted recently in several other western newspapers, show several depictions of the prophet Muhammad, including one where he sports a bomb labeled with the Islamic creed in his turban. (You can check them out here.) Apparently, the Koran strictly forbids any visual depiction of Muhammad, just like the White family prohibits any visual depiction of Shaun’s face.

Ski Dubai.  Not Pictured:  The Prophet MuhammadLook, we can respect that Muslims don’t want people running around willy nilly publishing photos of Muhammad. Last month, we were given video clips of Muhammad learning frontside lipslides at Ski Dubai, but we showed proper restraint. We can wait until the dude at least learns how to 270 on, for sure.

But, for reals, the widespread, violent reaction that has escalated in the past few days has been ridiculous, and quite frankly, really fucking scary. Protestors in Syria and Lebanon burned down Danish and Norwegian embassies, and several people in Kabul were killed in violent clashes — all because of a dozen or so cartoons.

What needs to happen is this: Muslim peeps in the east AND in the US need to get their own shit together and stop worrying about what is happening with the rest of us non-Muslims. We don’t come over to the middle east and cause all kinds of a ruckus and demand that they accept our cultural norms. Er, wait a minute, maybe we do, but you get our point. If some western newspapers want to print cartoons that you consider uncool, then don’t buy the newspapers, or better yet, write a few strongly worded letters. Wanton destruction and death over a few cartoons is just plain childish.

Look, maybe we have grossly misunderstood the issue, but the principle at hand is pretty simple. Muslims believe it’s blasphemy to visually depict this guy, but the rest of us don’t. Muslims also aren’t down with beer drinking or the public display of hot, partially clothed women… does it give people the right to torch a US embassy when the next SI swimsuit edition is published? Should irrational fanatics burn down the US Capitol building because Bud Light won the Bud Bowl?

We don’t think so. Got comments? Post ‘em below, or send us mail, bitches.

Punxsutawney Phil: Winter is Fabulous! February 2, 2006

So, Punxsutawney Phil has predicted another 6 weeks of winter. That little bitch better be right, because those of us stuck on the eastside are tired of riding mud covered trails and generally living through the what has been the lamest January ever.

You Go Girl!Phil also had another Groundhog day surprise: he stunned the world by announcing that he was coming out of the closet. The locals at Gobbler’s Knob were so excited that they threw a huge gay rager and stayed up all night doing the YMCA. Dude, we don’t make this shit up, we just report it straight gonzo style.

Rick Santorum could not be reached for comment, but we’re pretty sure that he’s really pissed off.

Skier beats up Rider January 31, 2006

This may be one of the only times in history that a two-planker got the better of a rider. Of course, the skier was an old man and the rider was a teenage girl.

Click here to read what happened.

Nomenclature Science January 30, 2006

Check it — there were some really exciting developments over the weekend. Most of these developments were related to the X games and we are dying to talk about them, but our editor is forcing us to address more pressing issues first.

What could be more pressing than the X-games or gushing about how sweet Travis Rice is?

We got a steezy new name for the blog, yo! We are now officially Gonzo Rangers. That way everyone will know that in addition to having mad sword fighting and wilderness survival skills like Aragorn son of Arathorn, we are also representing straight Gonzo style like the late, great Hunter S. Thompson. That’s just how we get down.

What do you think? Drop us some comments, dog.

Also, we have a new domain name — now you can hook it up directly at www.gonzorangers.com. Try it out, it’s fun and it will make our Google Analytics numbers look sweeter.

Sweet Music January 18, 2006

Here are a couple of albums that I have been sweating lately and have been in heavy rotation on my iPod at the gym. If you have XM, you may recognize them if you listen to channels 43 and 47.

She Wants Revenge – She Wants Revenge
Bloc Party – Silent Alarm
The Bravery – The Bravery
Notorious BIG & Frank Sinatra – Remixed

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