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Concept Albums > Internet Dating August 1, 2006

When we Rangers are not replying to fictitious police inquires from ‘police_matters@yahoo.com,’ we are listening to music and riding. Most of the time we are doing both.

Looking back, we have all purchased singles of our favorite artist or bands and some of us BBDeven purchased a 45 or two. We are sure some of you still have that ‘Do Me!’ single by BBD just waiting to be played when Skids come back and you can sport that HyperColor shirt. Over time, we have progressed to listening past that one moneymaker on the album and gone on to hear the whole album all the way through. Having done that, the arere really not too many albums that we can listen all the way through from start to finish and really enjoy to whole collection of songs.

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Free the Music March 9, 2006

This is totally off the topic of snowboarding, but WTF, we’re going to have to start writing about something else sooner or later. Today we’re writing to you about Eliot “Free the Music” Spitzer, the New York state attorney general who has filed yet another payola law suit, this time against a major radio conglomerate, Entercom.

First, a caveat: normally, we hate attorney generals of just about any kind because we believe in Freedom, and usually, attorney generals despise it. Spitzer, however, has used his time as an attorney general to tackle bloated, iron-fisted corporate tyrant and seven headed Hydra that is the music business, which has enslaved music fans and artists alike.

If you were brave enough to follow the link above, we’ll be the first to agree with you that this whole topic is boring as shit, especially as reported by the MSM. Anything dealing with corporate doings and big business is generally really lame, but this particular topic is important, because it deals with what you are hearing on the radio, in the ski lodge, on the TV, every day of the week. So, here’s a condensed version of what happens with the payola scam, and why it is important.

The Mars Volta, not playing on your local rock radioLet’s say, you go out one day and buy the new Mars Volta album, because you really sweat their unique brand of progressive rock psychedelia. In an ideal economy, your $17 vote for Mars Volta would encourage the market to produce more albums by the Mars Volta or artists like them. However, in the real world, payola pops up and totally fucks you in the ass.

Likely less than a one of your 17 dollars of it is going in to the pockets of the Mars Volta. After the retailer gets his cut, the majority of the profit gets handed over to one of the big four record labels (and no matter how “indie” the record label is, you’re just about guaranteed that it is owned by one of these evil giants.) Not that any of this is that much of a problem — yet. The record label could take that money, and invest it back into producing a new Mars Volta album, or perhaps in a new, up and coming band that might be even sweeter.

But, remember, the big four record labels (EMI, Sony-BMG, Universal Music and Warner), are evil bitches. They hate freedom, are ambivalent about music, and are determined to make as much money as possible even if it means crushing the very soul of rock music. So, they’ll take much of the profit they’ve earned off your Mars Volta purchase, and hand it over to radio conglomerates who control the playlists for most of the radio stations around the country, in exchange for spins on a pop record of their choosing. This is called payola, and it blows because instead of hearing more Mars Volta, you hear more Jessica Simpson, or Celine fucking Dion.

Why is that such a problem?

First, because Celine Dion and Jessica Simpson suck. (If you disagree, go read another blog. And yeah, we agree that Simpson is pretty easy on the eyes, but we’re talking about her music here.)

Second, because DJs, historically, provide a valuable service in that they are wading through tons of garbage music, finding spicy new cuts, and sharing them with you, so that you get to discover new artists without having to listen to shitty bands for several days on end.

This is how you remind me how shitty rock radio is becomingNowadays, though, radio conglomeration and payola have re-worked this whole process. DJs these days are spineless corporate toadies. When your local K106 DJ says “Check out this hot new track from Nickelback,” really the DJ knows the song sucks badly, but some fat, cigar smoking executive in a pin stripe suit with pointy hair is leering over him, threatening to shut the DJ out of the radio biz forever if he does play crappy music and like it. This fat executive can do this because due to radio conglomeration, his company (either Entercom, Clear Channel, or Infinity Broadcasting) owns about half the radio stations in the DJ’s city, and hundreds and hundreds more across the country. The fat executive gets paid by the record labels, the record labels sell more Nickelback and Jessica Simpson albums, and fatass executives everywhere are happy.

Meanwhile, your local rock radio has totally gone down the shitter, you haven’t heard a great new band since you bought Mack Dawg’s “From Russia With Love”, and Ashley Simpson, the no talent ass clown and biggest poser in all of rock music, inexplicably becomes a platinum selling artist. Somewhere out there, the next Radiohead or Pink Floyd is about to call it quits, because in spite of producing some incredible revolutionary and groundbreaking music, the industry just isn’t into finding new artists when it can turn a quick profit paying for spins to sell crusty, cookie cutter records.

Enter Eliot Spitzer, who like David slinging away at Goliath, is determined to break up the shady (not to mention illegal) payola cycle. In the past he’s settled with Warner and Sony which got them off the hook a little easy, but we’re hoping this new attack on radio conglomerates has legs and will hopefully ensnare the other conglomerates. We’ll be following it religiously, anyway.

In the meantime, don’t pay for your studio music anymore, because you are just feeding the Borg. Pirate your shit online, and support your favorite artist by seeing them live.

Wow, that was a long one. Hopefully we didn’t lose you — drop us comments or mail, unless you work in the music biz, in which case you should go fuck yourself.

GR sweet site of the week is….. February 13, 2006

Pandora! Pandora is a sweet music site that lets you make radio stations based on your favorite songs and artists. The big bonus is that this FREE service plays ENTIRE suggested songs that you can approve or reject to fine tune future recommendations. It rules iTunes because Apple only lets you preview short segments of songs. Besides, Pandora is part of the Music Genome Project which we’re sure somehow sticks it to the RIAA. Shit, I just mentioned RIAA, now someone named Ranger Gonzo will get sued.

The Real Bachelor…Yeah Boy!!!!!!!!!! February 3, 2006

So all of the ladies have been yacking it up about the Bachelor this season. Apparently he is in France and it is so romantic and blah blah blah….well, don’t believe the hype. The real deal this season is the Flavor of Love with none other than our favorite walking clock, Flavor Flav. VH1 has brought the noise with this masterful combination of rich emotional drama meets skank fest and it’s no joke.

Flavor Flav in the house! Flavor proves he got game as he tries to find who will be the next Mrs. Flav. At the end of each episode, instead of a lame rose, each lady (we use that term loosely) gets a sweet wall clock necklace so they know “what time it is.” As the season has progressed, the contestants go to Flav to backstab each other and he soon learns that he can’t truss it. You get to see how he chooses to fight the power to have a good time.

We strongly recommend you watch the Flavor of Love. You can watch that other show, cry, and be lame…….we try to help you all we can but we can’t do nothing for you man.

Sweet Music January 18, 2006

Here are a couple of albums that I have been sweating lately and have been in heavy rotation on my iPod at the gym. If you have XM, you may recognize them if you listen to channels 43 and 47.

She Wants Revenge – She Wants Revenge
Bloc Party – Silent Alarm
The Bravery – The Bravery
Notorious BIG & Frank Sinatra – Remixed